.. haha, real funny... just cause a guy is afflicted with crummy vision and has to wear coke-bottle lenses, I was branded. Un desirable, Un loveable, and definitely UN Fuckable! A brand I wore right through university, and even now. I fell in love once. Completely, and stupidly to a girl. Cynthia. A wonderfully creative and beautiful soul. She was a writer and as an artist she wore an artists passions. She taught me how to kiss one day. I was hers. Unfortunately she couldn't give herself. Having suffered some unspeakable emotional trauma as a child, she could never entirely love anyone. I moved out west where I hoped to forget her. But I never did I forget Cynthia and her gentle "cookie kisses"I'm almost fifty now, Oh, I've been married, for 20 years. To a bitch that never really gave a shit and wouldn't even kiss me, thought it was dirty, or I was dirty. Only good thing that came from that was my two kids, or at least one of them cares.So now I live alone, in a lousy 1 bedroom. Then I went into the house to check on dinner. It was ready. My aunt was packing it up in a real picnic basket. It smelled delicious. When she finished packing it, with a coke and a sprite to drink, I put it in my car. Then I left to go meet this girl. The trip was long. Seemed too long. But I arrived. And I waited for her to get off work. And when she did, we decided to go to the Wal-mart parking lot and have our picnic. And everything went smoothly. Everything went great. We talked and laughed and joked and flirted. We enjoyed the food. The only thing that went differently from my dream, was that it never rained and we never fucked. She did however, press herself against me, right before we parted ways. We looked into each other’s eyes. And when I leaned down to kiss her, she turned her head so that I merely kissed her cheek. She laughed and smiled at me. “Not yet. I’m not ready for that yet.”And with that she left. I was in shock for a little while. But I soon went home, crawled.
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